The Co-Pilot's in the kitchen with a spatula & he isn't afraid to use it!

Loves! The Co-Pilot is with us again to cast his keen culinary eye over seasons 1 & 2. What will he find? some hands down cheese & chive crackers? some out and out caviar & champagne corkers? or perhaps some cheap mouldy cheeses?...Over to you Co-P


Rose - Fairy Floss (6/10)
End Of The World - A cheese platter (7)
Unquiet Dead - A lovely glass of red (9)
Aliens Of London - A cheap surprising glass of champers (7.5)
WW3 - A cheap unsurprising glass of champers (5)
Dalek - A spectacular gateau that looks better than it tastes (7)
Long Game - Some toffees, mint creams & licorice that has gone hard (5.5)
Father's Day - Cordon Bleu! (9)
Empty Child - A cellar full of winning vintages (10)
Doctor Dances - A second cellar full! (9.5)
Boomtown - A cellar full of tomato juice :( (5.5)
Bad Wolf - Fabulous champagne & wonderful hors douerves (10)
Parting Of The Ways - ...Followed by a thoroughly wonderful meringue (8.5)

(insert ten-inch)

Christmas Invasion - A fun xmas bon-bon containing crappy jokes, a silly paper hat &
a hom-hum plastic trinket

New Earth - Artificial sweetener (4)
Tooth & Claw - A heart sunday roast (8.5)

(From this point on, the Co-Pilot gives a big contemptuous yawn to scores out of 10. Scores are for books fools!)

School Reunion - A favourite pasta recipe...overcooked
Girl In The Fireplace - A deliciously opulent tiramisu enjoyed amongst tender
embraces & longing sighs with your beautiful lover!

(oh Co-Pilot you old silver tongue you!!)

Rise Of The Cybermen - A hot cup of instant coffee
Age Of Steel - A (Lucozer?)-warm cup of instant coffee
Idiot's Lantern - Brussel sprout & anchovie pie
Impossible Planet - An exotic goulash
Satan Pit - Fondue!
Love & Monsters - Soggy chips
Fear Her - Burnt toast
Army Of Ghosts - The keys to the candy store
Doomsday - A delicious but unsatisfying feed from the candy store

Runaway Bride - Christmas turkey - in the figurative sense & no other!

Thanks Co-P!

I'm off to the fridge....
x Lucozer.

The Co-Pilot's message from the Vasmasphere (as told to the Lucozer in Delphon) Part One!

People's of Aneth, please attend carefully, the message that follows is vital the future of you all....


5 Best Dalek Stories...

1. Evil Of The Daleks
2. Dalek's Masterplan
3. Genesis Of The Daleks
4. Power Of The Daleks
5. The Daleks


Best Stories Not Yet Released on DVD...

Deadly Assassin (Oh Lucothther!, 9 out of 10!!)
Seeds of Doom
The War Games
Terror Of The Zygons
The Daemons
Silurians (next year!!! - ed)
Enlightenment
Sea Devils (next year w/ Silurians - ed)
Kinda


21 Wonderful Story Titles...

Talons Of Weng-Chiang
Pyramids Of Mars
Inferno
Fury From The Deep
Horror Of Fang Rock
Green Death
Masque Of Mandragora
Mawdryn Undead
Ribos Operation
Vengeance On Varos
Leisure Hive
Snakedance
Faceless Ones
Edge Of Destruction
Nightmare Of Eden
Claws Of Axos
Terminus
Keys Of Marinus
Armageddon Factor
Arc Of Infinity
King's Demons


25 Woeful Story Titles...

Deadly Assassin
City Of Death
Robots Of Death
Seeds of Death
Seeds of Doom
Mysterious Planet
Planet Of The Daleks
Planet Of Evil
Mind Of Evil
Mindwarp
Time Monster
Time-Flight
Time & The Rani
Invasion Of Time
Hand Of Fear
Enemy Of The World
Invisible Enemy
Attack Of The Cybermen
Revenge Of The Cybermen
Terror Of The Vervoids
The Rescue
The Chase
Colony In Space
Silver Nemesis
Delta & The Bannermen (the all-time clanger? - ed.)


Elocution!!!!!!!!(?)

Gilbert M "I was EGG-ziled from Vas-il-yip" "You need me & I need me!!"
Valentine Dyall "You wretched BOOUUUYYY!!" "rasp, cough, burn, melt, rasp, cough"
Soldeed "Lord Nimon, Lord NIIImmon"
Garron "Don't let me lose faith in you my boOOUUUyyy"
4th Doctor "You're a very beautiful woman..probably"
Borusa #1 "Runthible The Fatuouth" "Oh Doctor!...9 out of 10!"
David Collings
Kevin Stoney "MmmmmPppaacker"
Borusa #2 "The teacher..learns..from the student!!!"
Borusa #4 "it was a game, within a game"

And the winner is!!!!.......Gilbert M...."You don't know his mOOOOOds!"


Doctor Who's 20 Golden Greats (out now on Dino Beta Video? - Ed)

The Daleks
Dalek's Masterplan
Power Of The Daleks
Evil Of The Daleks
Tomb Of The Cybermen
Abominable Snowmen
Web Of Fear
Fury From The Deep
Invasion
The War Games
Spearhead From Space
The Silurians
Inferno
The Daemons
Genesis Of The Daleks
Terror Of The Zygons
Pyramids Of Mars
Seeds Of Doom
Deadly Assassin
Robots Of Death
Talons Of Weng-Chiang
Horror Of Fang Rock
City Of Death
Leisure Hive
Logopolis
Kinda
Earthshock
En....zzzzzzzzzzz...gurgle...zzzzzzzzz!


At that point the Co-Pilot's eyebrows fell silent. Nothing like impending contemplation of latter-day JNT-era fare to send you to sleep....

When he wakes up & transmits further, you will all collectively be the first to know...

Night night Co-Pilot, sweet dreams...Lucozer

A radar blip from Vasilip!!!

Loveys!!!! It seems that the Co-Pilot has re-stablished contact with Wuundanoogoo HQ!!! For the past several weeks he has been on a desperately dangerous covert mission to return Gilbert M from exile to his home planet of Vasilip & help him to rouse a 'revel-you-shhnn' & seize power. Nothing has been heard from the Co-Pilot since he was 7 days out from our HQ on Aneth. Until now!!

The message we have recieved has no sound & the picture is badly affected by astral static & solar flares, but we believe it is indeed the Co-Pilot trying to communicate with us. Luckily the Co-Pilot is fluent in at least 58 alien dialects & body languages; including Delphon!. The lack of sound is therefore only a minor hindrance. Our translators are reading The Co-Pilot's feverish eyebrow undulations as I write.

It seems that the mission was thrown into chaos & disarray when The Co-Pilot's Skonnon Star-Cruiser crash landed on entry into the Vasmasphere. Sadly, from the early part of the message we have assertained that Gilbert M's own long time & long in the tooth """Co-Pilot""", Joseph C, perished in the crash.

The Co-Pilot's Delphon message is hardly revealing what would be expected. No detailed damage reports, no escape plan. His eyebrow elocution is also proving erratic. He seems to be reeling off blushingly nerdy cum exquistely wondrous "top" lists with head spinning speed! Has the crash affected his mind? Or is it a masterfully disguised code? Has he in fact been captured, & not want wanting his true identity to be discovered, been forced to encrypt his true message in the frothiest of fan boy foam. Stay tuned folks........

My dear Wuundanougats!

The Co-Pilot & I have spent the last couple of weeks ruminating over the season 3 finale & the state of our beloved 'Doctor Who' in general. This coming sunday we will be presenting our joint summary tome. Apologies for the delay, we have been polishing our superlatives (didn't take very long) & sharpening our damnatives (took somewhat longer). See you soon chums...

Lucozer....

Mother Of All Doctor Who Marathons: Part One

The Co-Pilot & I have just this weekend subjected our wits & senses to a mammoth Doctor Who marathon during which we imbibed 16 episodes of Dr Who (including a fresh out of the oven 'Blink') over a 30 hour period. About 9 of those 30 hours were taken up by exhausted sleep, so we didn't do much else. It was fab!

We began our epic eyeball workout on Saturday afternoon with 'Greatest Show In The Galaxy'. I was expecting the usual latter-day JNT era garish, panto-esque trimmings for sure, but I was also expecting a redeeming dark & unsettling undercurrent & some moments of genuine terror & suspense that would lift the flawed production to (dare I say) late-era-minor classic status (lots of qualifications I know). Sadly, I was disappointed in every diabolical department. Performance wise, McCoy is merely competent (with the requisite grimacing teeth & rolling 'r's in plentiful supply). He falls short of his later impressive performances in the likes of 'Ghostlight' & 'COF'. Sophie Aldred really has very little to do & like McCoy is a fair way off her season 26 peak.

The guest cast are uniformly poor (varying from wooden dullness; 'Flowerchild', to excruciatingly OTT charicature; 'Nord', 'The Captain'....) with one glowing exception; The Chief Clown. He scales grand heights of sinister menace when considering the lack of effort & credibility around him. I love his breathy, wide- eyed, halting delivery of his lives. He obviously thought about the character for more than two seconds. His smily face/ hand gesture is absolutely magnificent. This is the stuff of Dr Who! Vaguely disturbing & perfect for playground imitation everywhere. If the Co-Pilot & I were still in year 3 at school (maybe even year 11 if no one was around!), we would be mimicking that gesture at recess tomorrow without a doubt. He nailed it & no one else in the sorry cast did.

The concept is quite a strong one; the Gods of Ragnarock on an unceasing hunt for thrills through the aeons, destroying performers who fail to quench their thirst for entertainment or can't keep them interested. Also, the idea of the story being a parable for the whole show itself is potentially interesting & quite noble, but the design, direction & script are all blushingly sub par & render those promising ideas sadly impotent. Clunky camerawork, wafer-thin characters, laughable dialougue ('your kites, your beautiful kites' delivered with all the panache of a plank of 2 b 4) & as for the sass-talking stereotype that is the Ringmaster throwing 'baby's' around willy nilly.... All these awful elements add up to a wretched mess. The 'Happiness Patrol' is often held up as the 'finest' example of all that was wrong with late 80's Dr Who, but this is the grand contender for that ignoble title for me (from season 25 at least). The best that can be said about this rubbish is that it is still a good deal better than most of season 24. This would get Dr Who a life sentence in a court of Televisual law, whereas most of season 24 would see the show on death row.

Some good incidental music aside (which can often lift drivel into atmospheric watchability) this just doesn't work. I really thought this was going to be much better & I didn't really expect that much from it, which is often my downfall when trawling the 'Who archives'. I knew I'd have to sift through the shit to find the nuggets (gold ones that is). One nugget (the Chief Clown) & a load of...

After the brief detour of a Traveling Wilburys documentary & a marvellous dinner at a nearby Cafe, we then recommenced the marathon with the esteemed 'Seeds of Doom'.

We began with episode 2 as we had watched & thoroughly enjoyed part one on Youtube a week ago. I expected a lot from this grand & ambitious epic & for the most part I wasn't disappointed. Parts 1 & 2 particularly, at the Antarctic base, are a master class in 'how to do' Dr Who. Claustrophobic camera work, moody visuals, strong nuanced performances, inspired characterisation & taut direction all topped off by one of the greatest incidental scores in the history of the show (by the wildly talented & shamefully underused Geoffrey Burgon). The strings & woodwind score is absolutely bone chilling & used to brilliant effect.

Tom Baker gives one of his greatest performances; well past the finding-his-feet nerviness of his very early episodes & before the 'bored & restless God' schtick of his mid to late era, he is sublimely alien. No one can touch him. I would even go so far as to say this is as good as our beloved Doctor gets (nudging out Troughton by the thinnest of whiskers). Tom can turn on a needle head. From disarmingly flippant to brutally intense in half a blink. Even after 25 years of innumerable viewings of his work, his deftly delivered one liners & masterful body language had the Co-Pilot & I in complete awe. From hysterical laughter to slack jawed disbelief, we were but putty to a true master. The fact that even his throwaway quips & boggle-eyed grinning head tilts made us leave the comfort of warm rugs on a cold night to rewind the tape on more than one occasion speaks volumes. The man is a genius & this was him near his peak.

There is really not much to criticise. Tony Beckley's 'Chase' is a textured & fascinating adversary. He only has a couple of slight stumbles. His second or third take on 'Why am I surrounded by fools/ imbeciles/ idiots' seems flat & unispired, as if he's thinking 'oh dear, surely they could have found a slight variation on this daft line' or 'I already realised I'm among dullards half an hour ago, why am I so shocked to realise it again?'. I love the be-gloved symphonic wankery with his organ knobs. Wonderful disturbed villianery!

Of course the large Krynoid looks crap, but the sound it makes is wonderful & everyone involved plays with such passion & energy that it really is easily overlooked. Past viewings have lessened the deflation of first seeing it's silly CGI head wobbling above the mansion. Part 6 is where 'Seeds' falls a little flat & this perhaps partly explains why (particularly after the peerless first two parts) this doesn't quite rival 'Genesis' in fan esteem. The 'blow it up' finale & UNIT tack on is lazy & painfully predictable. It is also padded & the tension does drop well before the end of the episode. 'Seeds' had scaled such heights though & maintained them through the lions share of the story, that I can forgive it's coughing stumble down the home straight. Mr Camfield excels for the most part as we'd expect, but seems to realise a UNIT shoot 'em up finale is bound to be lame no matter how you play it. Perhaps he handed over the directorial joystick to a green but ambitious young Graeme Harper for the last half an episode & took off down the pub with Beckley!

Some of the grizzliest & most potent cliffhangers of all-time (Sarah clamped next to the opening pod, the blood & bone grinder set piece) are the icing a-top inspiration & class on all levels of the production. This a rare animal; utterly terrifying in childhood, pleasingly atmospheric, credible & entertaining in adulthood & also, a story to proudly show the 'non-believers' in our lives. A story that might just garner some sympathy & understanding for our strange obsession.


To be continued...

Next episode..I will wax on 'Planet Of Spiders' and 'Blink'...

Martha's Lookin' Finer..Return To Zeta Minor..Co-Pilot gets moist in '42' different ways!

The Planet of Evil of 2007, 42 takes the cake and doesn't spare on the cream...(and my, how tasty this here cream is....mmmmmm)!

Marvellous it is to see (CHAUVENIST COMMENT ALERT) Martha really sweat it out - literally and figuratively...how fabulously intelligent and action-savvy she is ...and what a total, gob-smacking spunk! RRRAAARRR! Oh to be stuck in any enclosed space with you Ms Jones...RRRAAARRR..I am a BIG, BIG fan, Freema.

It is amply evident after this showing that Martha is turning into the perfect foil for the ever surprising Tennant (who once again puts in an excellent turn in unfamiliar territory for his Doctor...the preening know-it-all of last season is, thank Buddha, a long-forgotten blip on his ever brightening radar). There is much more intrigue to the Tennant Doctor now that he has a Sarah-Jane (Martha) rather than an Ace (Rose) as his companion. He is once again a man of mystery and a fascinatingly vulnerable one at that. No longer is he little more than Rose's domesticated/ emancipated, fey boyfriend, who each episode - on a whim - lept out of character and did ridiculously unconvincing butch things, and then kept boasting about it. Good riddance to that tosser! On this, Eccleston's macho/innocent child-man provided a riveting balance to the young/wise Rose character - the relationship positively sparkled and was full of sexual tension. The Tennant Doctor however was completely suffocated by the Rose (and her family) dynamic and gagged his way through last season in a most cloying way. Not so season 3!

Graeme Harper is the closest thing we are going to get this century to Masters Camfield and Maloney and we love him for it. This is his best showing of the new series so far. He succeeds in stretching the tension out over the full 42(?) minutes. He notably manages to get the best score thus far out of the unpredictable (or should that be predictably bad?) Murray Gold...how wonderful are those 30 odd seconds of silence as Martha raps aimlessly on the glass window of the capsule, while the Doctor delivers some of his best stuff since the 70s? I was gripped my loves, I was gripped!

As well as being thrilled at how serious and compelling this episode was, I was also delighted at the subtelty of its moral message. This is something that new Who has shown it can do well...the theme of nature rebelling against human greed or ignorance is a welcome undercurrant to an excellent action adventure.

Suffice it to say, 42 is the best story of the season thus far. The prospect that this will be only the fourth or fifth best story overall - just look at the potential treasures that await...makes my already whetted appetite most moist indeed. I fully expect this to be the best season since Tom left! I have been licking my lips in juicy anticipation for Human Nature next week...

What a blessing it is to be a Doctor Who fan in 2007!

Devolution of the daleks

The worst Dalek story ever...the most 'Schlocktor Who' of all (New Earth and Runaway Bride might be jealous of this 'honour' but f**k them).

This is akin to a cartoon, from the terrible masks to the cardboard dialogue.

The case against:

Soloman was one of the few redeeming features in this debacle, but as he makes his stand against the Daleks one remembers the president from Rise of the Cybermen last year and feels disappointed at the obviousness of the recycling that is going on. New ideas please team.

Why does the Doctor offer his life in a grandstanding moment? It seems that this, like much of this story, exists purely for effect. Subtlety is so much more the domain of Doctor Who and this kind of macho "I am a selfless hero ra ra ra" bollocks, undermines the wonder of the show and its protagonist. If that sounds po-faced and superior, well maybe it is.

Dalek Sec is truly awful. The actor seems intent on evoking the best-forgotten memory of John Lumic. His performance is uncooked, scurvy-inducing ham.

Other evocations of last seasons early Cybermen 'opus' are reflushed through the script - the idea of 'mining' humans, being one obvious example. Another being the re-pillaging of the Frankenstein mythology. Get some new ideas please team - you have the keys to the castle...

Murray Gold as usual fills the space with Hollywood cliches...for Christ's sake man, listen to Brian Eno for a bit...let the audience find the meaning of the scene for themselves...with your pizzicato stabs and outrageously butch choir...stop telling us how to feel!...for the most part we are intelligent viewers. We'll get there ourselves. In all faireness, even the great Dudley Simpson started to run out of ideas, having to write a score every week, so maybe this is a critisism pointed at your superiors Murray. Perhaps they should give you a break. You could write maybe a third of the season's scores (it is true than now and again you have written some absolutely lovely stuff) and bring in a couple of other musical tyros to have a go at the rest.

Ok so it's time to say a few good thing about this episode, because frankly I could go on and on about its flaws.

I never thought I would say this, but the best thing about Doctor Who at the moment (apart of course from the fact that it is on our screens at all - and for that I must praise you my favourite aunty, Russell T.) is David Tennant. David, I am falling in love with you big time. You look like a man constrained by crappy scripts. You look like a man who could do anything with the right material. Please don't leave yet....I am a converted cheerleader to your cause.

Other good stuff...the line: "You told us to imagine, and we have imagined your irrelevance" was a fabulous shaft of gold, where most else was dark.

Other random thoughts:
1) How many himbos can there be in one episode?
2) Did Paul (Showgirls, Basic Instinct) Verhoeven have a hand in this shite? If not, why were the production team trying to emulate his unbelievable drivel?
3) The story was so ridiculous and over the top that I found myself praying that a buxom swiss farm girl (sorry about the sexist stereotype, chums) would come down from the hills and start milking Dalek Sek's teats! Alas no such pleasure.
4) The crap sentimentalism of Tallulah, waxing lyrical about the wonders of New York left me laughing at the shallowness of it all. If you are going to set a story in New York, and go on about how fabulous it is, show us New York's wonders don't tell us in a CGI homage (City of Death lavished Paris upon us and we went away contented)

Anyway. This sucked. Thankfully the trailer for next week looked sexy as!

Kisses

The Co - Pilot

Daleks in Womanhattan by the Co-Pilot

Daleks in Manhattan is a grim episode touching on themes of genetic engineering, racial purity (it is a Dalek story) and class segregations. Though it appears on the surface to have a lot going for it - not the least of which is the flashy setting and of course the return of the Daleks, it is ultimately an uninvolving and disappointing episode. Firstly, I just did not get into the showgirl stuff - which seemed to be there solely to generate laughs based on exaggerations and cliches - T.Davies templates. The pig 'experiments' seemed to again be there just for effect - we are given no explanations as to why pigs were chosen for modification - particularly as they have already been used by the Slitheen for similar reasons...why not genetically modified sheep, ducks or even cabbages ??? I am not really a fan of the new series Daleks either - perhaps it's just personal taste, but there is something about Nick Briggs's performance that irks me...his Dalek voicing somehow seems too passionate and over-played.

For me Daleks in Manhattan suffers from many of the same problems as its Cybermen counterpart 2 parter from last season - a thin plot weighed down by charicatures, and interspersed with images of horror that are not carried off with enough panache to be classic Who moments. Fingers crossed things will be better next week.

To end on a positive note, great to say that the David Tennant renaissance continues.

See you next time.

Love

The Skonnon Co-Pilot

The Co-Pilot's Gridlock Review

**SPOILER WARNING**

Fabulous! The best realized Russell T script (bar the finales) thus far. I really thought this was going to be god-awful and I am very happy to say I was wrong. The Macra - although completely superflous to the story - brought a huge fanboy whoop of delight to me and the Lucozer...lovely stuff Darling T Davies, lovely. I was flumoxed, ((though in a delighted way) with delight) by just how much better the special effects and production values are a year on from NEW EARTH...is this really the same show? The cats, the face, the cars, the ending, Tennant...I enjoyed it all really....this is the template for throwaway stories. Thanks team.
The Co-Pilot

THE SHAKESPEARE CODE - A Co-Pilot's Sonnet of Lament

A pretty setting and a jokey take on history do not a wonderful story make. Little more than a poor man's UNQUIET DEAD, THE SHAKESPEARE CODE just didn't do it for me. From the cliched panto witches (with costume department atrocities for masks) to the wafer-thin characterisation of Will (surely he would have been a more complex, mysterious, thoughtful and intriguing figure than we see here...?)...this just isn't my prefered flavour of Doctor Who. I long for a terrifying and seemingly unsurmountable villain and a clever SURPRISING set of events...a story with few genuine surprises is a story that is hard to get interested in. The underlying message of "the power of words" is intriniscally flawed...Shakspeare's genius wasn't words, it was recreating reality (and imagining new realities) through words AND images...he was after all a practitioner of the theatre...not a writer of books....

Did Ron Howard have a hand in this...?

Not as engaging as last week...however I suspect the real cream in this season is still to come.

The Co-Pilot

SMITH AND JONES - The Co-Pilot's initial reaction

I liked SMITH AND JONES. I liked it's style and it's wonderful visual effects. I liked the adult tone - the cruel death of the senior doctor, the horrible effect of the Judoon gun zapping a hapless hospital person. Mostly however I liked SMITH AND JONES because it wasn't crappoola! Unlike the puerile "romps" RTD has specialised in (perhaps the worst exampe of which is NEW EARTH), SMITH AND JONES is classy, tense in parts and fun in a non schticky kind of way. I am delighted to say it didn't feel like it was being made to appeal to the lowest common denominator. Martha is wonderful straight off the bat...and what spunk! Tennant manages to be less cringe inducing that usual, putting one in mind of the fine actor he is often reputed to be. In short, a fine season opener...at last! I suspect this will be one of the lesser stories of the year, which bodes wonderfully well for a sparkling season ahead.

The Co-Pilot

THE CO-PILOT'S SEASON 3 FORECAST (hot and sunny with nary a cloud)

Hi chums,

here is a quick pre-season critique of season 3...filled with ridiculous assumption and unfounded optimism/pessimism about what lays ahead!

SMITH AND JONES

Judging by the previews the effects look pretty dazzling...the Judoon marching forth from their craft for example. Not surprising given that Auntie Russell seems to favour "speccy" over "substantial" when it comes to season openers ie ROSE and NEW EARTH. Early signs suggest that this might be a tad better than those.

THE SHAKESPEARE CODE

Could be surprisingly good ala TOOTH AND CLAW or surprisingly crap ala IDIOT'S LANTERN. The witches look bollocks but the premise of the story and the setting offer hope.

GRIDLOCK

Not holding out a lot of hope for this one. An early pick for wooden spoon. I suppose the Face of Boe's secret might spice things up a bit, but it seems the cat is already out of the bag ie "You are not the only one Doctor"...lets hope there is more to it than that. Why a sequel for NEW EARTH??? Can you imagine if Graham Williams tried to do a sequel to the Invisible Enemy for example??? Pure self indulgence.

DALEKS IN MANHATTAN / EVOLUTION OF THE DALEKS

Promises to be a fun romp. City of Death anyone?

THE LAZARUS EXPERIMENT

I was impressed by the trailer...there was something very simple and mildly disconcerting about the way Lazarus transforms himself. Let's hope the rest of it is marvelous.

42

Could be anything. Given the space setting (praise the Lord, not London/Cardiff again), I am quite looking forward to this one.

HUMAN NATURE / FAMILY OF BLOOD

Eureeka! Can't wait for this. I loved Father's Day and I really like the premise of this, though I haven't read the book. The Jack Straw scarecrows look promisingly menacing.

BLINK

Steven Moffat is Jimi Hendrix is Eric Clapton is GOD!!! Delighted to hear that this one is actually scary and not just throwaway comedy like Love and Monsters and Boomtown.

UTOPIA

Sir Derek J...greatest actor ever to appear on the show...return of the Macra....fabulous darlings fabulous! These ingredients should and will transform what might have been another FEAR HER into one of the highlights of the season. Does Jacobi turn into Simm in a Chronotis / Salyavin like revelation...or will it be a Tremas tragedy? I can't wait to find out. I imagine this is going to be a very emotional season, and my prediction is that Utopia will absorb most of the kleenexes.

BANGING OF DRUMS / LAST OF THE TIMELORDS

Has wonderful written all over it (hopefully not in glittery texta). Auntie Russ always saves his best for the big bang, and he always writes good last episodes too. This coupled with the expected tragedy and sadness bodes well for a cracker ending to a much better season, and of course it will probably set up some dazzling future stoushes between Mr Master and Mrs Doctor. Brothers or Lovers? (Final sentence brought to you by the Lucozer).

I think we are in for a real red hot go this season. Hope I'm right.

Hugs.

The Co-Pilot.

OUR HEROES

Here at Wuundanoogoo we have many heroes; talented folk who have given great service to 'Worlds Of Doctor Who' over the years. Here are a few off the top of our shriven head!....

Douglas Camfield, Geoffrey Burgon, Hugh Burden, Tony Beckley, Mary Tamm, Patrick Troughton, Robert Holmes, Kevin Stoney, Peter Howell, Ron Grainer, Michael Wisher, Tom Baker, Caroline John, Carey Blyton, Tristram Cary, Lalla Ward, David Maloney, William Russell, Dudley Simpson, June Hudson, Aubrey Woods, Lis Sladen, Naoki Mori, Freema Agyeman, David Daker, Peter Miles, Derek Martinus, Roger Murray-Leach, John Friedlander, Lovett Bickford, Roger Delgado, Philip Hinchcliffe, Valentine Dyall, Cyril Luckham, Frazer Hines, Christopher Eccleston, Stephen Moffatt, John Normington, Wendy Padbury, Marc Platt, Declan Mulholland, Broton, Binro The Heretic, The Taran Beast & The Shrivenzale!

THE JON PERTWEE YEARS 1970-1974

Some excerpts from our thoughts on every Jon Pertwee era Doctor Who story.


SEASON 7

'Spearhead From Space'

Co-Pilot – The scariest Doctor Who story ever?...Hugh Burden as Channing is on a different plane all together – he only has the stand in the background of a shot to be creepy & unsettling.

Lucozer – It looks superb, the use of grainy film is very effective. Pertwee is great from the outset as is Caroline John. Best first story for a Doctor ever…full stop.

'The Silurians'

Co-Pilot - The Silurian eye view we see as a Silurian ascends, with tremendous deep reptilian breathing, & as he staggers towards the farm, is up there with the series greatest ever moments…Having a few of the characters driven mad by the events in the caves adds greatly to the claustrophobic menace. I can certainly remember many lunch & recess times full of Silurian inspired mimicry!

Lucozer – The Silurians are brilliantly realised; their appearance & movements, their society, their ethics & interrelations…everything. It contains two all-time classic cliffhangers; the Doctor's first meeting with a Silurian in the farmhouse & then when a couple of Silurians burn through the wall behind him while he is frantically trying to find an antidote to the virus. So many superb childhood memories…creepy & atmospheric.

'Ambassadors of Death'

Co-Pilot – Nothing too exciting happens over 7 long episodes & the guy with the dodgy French (?) accent undermines the whole thing…full of padding.

Lucozer – Slow, but it certainly has decent production values. It could have been done in 5 or 6 eps… I would even go so far as to say 'Dominator Rago' is a highlight; subtle & believable & much more convincing in this… the most graphically violent UNIT story ever; the scene in the warehouse with all the close up bullet deaths a case in point. UNIT Doctor Who by numbers, but still worth a look.

'Inferno'

Co-Pilot - …Inferno is more like a film than a TV show – the gritty oppressive quality Douglas Camfield evokes contributes a huge amount to the story's success. The parallel world stuff is highly effective & frightening. The cliff-hanger ending to part 6 is still unbearably dramatic…It maintains its quality over 7 episodes – something most four parters can't come close to emulating…

Lucozer – Fantastic! So tense and claustrophobic, it's almost unbearable. The ambient noise becomes increasingly unsettling. We are forced to relate to the Doctor more than ever in this 'fish out of water' plight because the companion is largely absent (Ditto 'Deadly Assassin'). Perhaps a good story to show non-fans if they can endure its length….So many potent childhood memories from Jon's first season. Season 7 is vastly underrated. It should be regarded as a classic up there with seasons 5, 13 & 14.


SEASON 8

'Terror Of The Autons'

Co-Pilot – The first & best Master story. This could have been even better if the Autons were as menacing as they were in Spearhead. There are many terrific & frightening moments...the suffocating chair, the master's eerie theme music, the Doctor pulling off the policeman's mask, the Auton being driven off the cliff then getting up and walking away…the Master in general!

Lucozer – This story makes the padding in other stories look all the more obvious. Almost as much happens in this as happens in Planet of the Spiders/ Daleks etc. A tight script & well paced. Classy Doctor Who that made the best of limited resources… That said, I just don't feel the urge to watch it that much. I don't know why.

'Mind Of Evil'

Co-Pilot – It has some excellent moments; the master smoking the cigar & the Keller machine bringing out all of the fearful images in the Doctor's mind (Cybermen & the fire) but it is also very bland and overlong. The Keller machine itself begins to get a little tedious after a while.

Lucozer – The Keller machine really freaked me out as a kid; a machine that could materialise anywhere & attack your brain! The sound effect & wobbly visuals I thought were great… Delgado is wonderfully malevolent…I love the 'Mao Tse Tung' scene, a nice touch...It's B&W status probably works in its favour. Creepy & tense.

'Claws Of Axos'

Co-Pilot – This is utter shite! Never can understand why this is rated a minor classic. The acting is forced & the special effects in the Axon spaceship are woeful. A great pity, as a kid I remember being very scared by the red tentacled Axon…Complete tosh!

Lucozer – Hugely overrated! The incidental music & direction are abominably ham fisted …seems like a bad student sci-fi film…The plot & concept are quite good but many departments let it down. If Dougie Camfield has directed this it could have been far superior.

'Colony In Space'

Co-Pilot - Pretty uninspiring. Dent is so boring, his hair is the most interesting thing about him – & that is really saying something. I prefer my villains to be dashing looking; not craggy po-paced old bores! Give me Soldeed or even the Nimon itself over Dent any day of the week!

Lucozer – Crap At Snails Pace! An endless procession of captures, escapes & tiresome politicking between unsympathetic & dull characters. Groan! I do like the scene where the Master offers the Doctor half-rulership of the universe though...I still have not watched this all the way through since 1986. Come to think of it, maybe I didn't even then?

'The Daemons'

Co-Pilot – Much better when viewed in grainy black & white. The Daemons is fabulous in lots of ways, although not as great as it was once reputed to be…Part one is a real humdinger…very atmospheric…Without doubt one of Pertwee's best, but just not THE BEST, as some influential critics used to maintain.

Lucozer – Bok is well realised & Mr Thorne is less painful here than in the 'Three Doctors'…. Part One is very sinister; the wild weather & the signs spinning around. However, this story is a perfect example of a sad & painfully common phenomenon in Doctor Who; good directors establishing wonderful tension & suspense early in a story, then being let down by budget restrictions which render the evil, when revealed, as laughable (see also 'Image Of Fendahl', 'Horror Of Fang Rock' & Nessie in 'Terror Of The Zygons') It must have galled directors when their fine work reached a dramatic zenith of silly CSO & poxy bubble wrap! No hands down classic but very good with some classic moments.


SEASON 9

'Day Of The Daleks'

Co-Pilot – A Minor classic? Sort of…Aubrey Woods who plays the Controller is brilliant, continuing the tradition of fantastic characters working for the Daleks (Mavic Chen, Nyder, Lytton, Tasambeker! (just kidding)) I remember being very captivated by the time tunnel stuff. The Doctor & Jo staying at Stiles' house & sampling his wine & cheese – great stuff!

Lucozer –…A clever little script & the Controller is superbly creepy. It is very polished production wise & it's shortness (four parts among many sixes), lack of obvious padding & its "playing with time" plot make it probably the closest to the new series of all the Pertwee era stories. Shame though that the Daleks are underused & their voices are so appalling.

'Curse Of Peladon'

Co-Pilot – The real Curse Of Peladon is Alpha Centauri! What or who is this most dodgy alien supposed to be a pastiche of? Is Alpha a raging queen? A feminist avenger gone wrong? A pre-pubescent boy whose voice hasn't broken yet? Ms/Mr Centauri stands out as woefully & memorably bad in an otherwise excellent adventure. The other aliens work well; Arcturus somehow overcomes design limitations to be an interesting & menacing character. The Ice Warriors are also superb. The whole idea of the Dr & Jo becoming emotionally involved in proceedings is very well handled…Naroon narooon naroon!!

Lucozer – Delegate Arcturus is a scream! I love him/ her/ it? Probably one of Ms Manning's better showings, even though she still over emphasises every gesture & emotion. The scene of the TARDIS landing on the windy cliff-face & the Doctor singing to Aggedor in the catacombs are vivid childhood memories. A strong & involving script presenting a well rounded view of a troubled society. A modest charmer.

'The Sea Devils'

Co-Pilot – …Owes much of its impact to an incredible soundtrack. Perhaps it is overlong, but the Sea Devils has an atmosphere of gloom throughout that is very enthralling. I still think a child these days would find some Dr Who stories to be chillingly frightening & this would be one of them. I love how the Dr goes to visit the Master – their relationship typifies the kind of dignity the Delgado Master had that the Ainley Master never came close to.

Lucozer – As a child it was a pinnacle, but memory has cheated a little. The Sea Devils base is far too colourful & bright, suffering in comparison with the gloomy, shadowy Silurian caves. Also, the Sea Devils look awkward & clunky when compared to the Silurians. This may be the fault of direction though; too many undramatic long shots. The Silurians were brilliantly revealed & realised with close ups on parts of them & using their strange vision & close miked breathing. Not so with the Sea Devils. They do look great rising from the water though…The Master/ Doctor banter is superb, well scripted & played. The memorable incidental music is perhaps a little overdone; almost as if they were excited at how (undeniably) great & strange it was & put it in too many places, often too loud & occasionally very jarring. Despite my criticisms, still marvelously entertaining.

'The Mutants'

Co-Pilot – Very sad to admit how crap this actually is, because I loved the atmosphere of it in 1986. Episode one is actually pretty good but, from there on in it all gets very bland. The acting is probably the most notable thing about it. The fat warlord guy with the dodgy Slade haircut is wooden & horrible. The Marshal over-acts through the whole thing. Did Cotton actually audition for the part?!

Lucozer – Certainly not diabolical in the way 'Twin Dilemma' & 'Delta' are, just deathly dull with a few excruciatingly bad moments for good measure. Cotton & the Captain are particularly dreadful, but Jon is solid as usual though & George 'Shaboogans' Pravda is always worth a moment of ones times.

'The Time Monster'

Co-Pilot – zzzzzzzzzz!

Lucozer – I have less childhood memories of this Pertwee story than any other, so a recent viewing held a curious interest for me & the panning it gets in 'received Dr Who Wisdom' led me to expect nothing. So its relative 'freshness' & my low expectations meant I quite enjoyed this frivolous & tacky runaround, despite some poor direction, woeful acting & the otherwise masterful Delgado straying the closest he ever came to lame eyebrow-arching-&-maniacal-laughing charicature (though through no fault of his own)


SEASON 10

'Three Doctors'

Co-Pilot – The goodness in this story is obvious. Part one is brilliant, as is part two. The ending with the whole of UNIT being sucked into the black hole is wonderful. Pat & William are fabulous. Jon fighting the dark side of Omega's mind is intense. Generally the story has the aura of an absolute classic. …Where it falls down though is the d-grade set design of Omega's Palace, the frankly ridiculous gel guards & the amateur bellowing of Stephen Thorne. All of these factors rob Omega & his world of the menace they might otherwise have had. A real pity as in every other respect this is possibly the best story of Pertwee's reign.

Lucozer - …Notably disappointing. It could/ should have been so much better. The Pat & Jon bickering scenes are largely clunky & childish (the scripts fault, not theirs) & the recorder sub plot is utter crap. The Brigadier is reduced to a blundering imbecile & the whole thing looks garish and panto-esque. I must concur with the Co-Pilot, the "amateur bellowing" of Mr Thorne is awful & renders the final moments of the story anti-climactic. It is still a lot of fun & has some great moments, but (rant alert!!) why do multi-doctor stories always have to be frivolous run-arounds? Why can't they be dark & compelling & blow our fucking minds! Three Doctors!!! Fan boys everywhere should be creaming themselves in unison! Three Doctors should mean thrice the tension, thrice the fear & thrice the brilliance. All these things seem to have been divided in this! Once again, why wasn't Mr Camfield brought in. Although, even he would have struggled to salvage something credible from the likes of the appalling gel guards & their hideous chorus of 'wob, wob, wob'.

'Carnival Of Monsters'

Co-Pilot - Like 'Claws Of Axos' this is always overrated. The circus duo with the Projector are really crap, they aren't funny at all. Michael Wisher is always really good & some of the bits inside the machine are effective, but overall it's pretty ordinary fare. Perhaps I'm missing something?

Lucozer – Classic my b*&^bag! What are the critics on about? This is drivel. The Drashigs are woeful & wouldn't scare a blind spielsnape. The 'fruit loop' duo are god-awful. Maybe there are one or two memorable moments; the 'big hand', the cruise ship with the 'sea dinosaur'. It has brevity in its favour & not much more. This is very average if not quite 'Mutants' level awful.

'Frontier In Space'

Co-Pilot – I remember being very impressed with the Draconians (even as an adult). The shock ending with the Daleks arrival & then the Master shooting the Doctor was very exciting. I like the idea that the Doctor travels across space & that the action takes place on several fronts, much like 'Genesis Of the Daleks'. Not too many bad moments off the top of my head.

Lucozer – An ambitious space opera on a shoe-string; impressive despite the usual meagre budget. The politics of the story are a little forced & creaky, but it is a polished production without too much padding & the different locations & strands of the story are juggled well. The marvellous John Friedlander again excels with his fantastic looking Draconian design. Roger Delgado is as exquisitely shady & textured as ever in his last story. Katy is actually pretty good in this, Delgado lifts her in their scenes together & they are surprisingly effective. It has flaws, but the Pertwee/ Letts & Dicks team seems well oiled here & they play to their strengths on this one.

'Planet Of The Daleks'

Co-Pilot – Could have been great, but on every level this is just a copy of Terry Nation's previous efforts with hardly an inspiring or original idea anywhere. I loved this when we were kids, but as adults, it just looks tacky & full of padding.

Lucozer – Part One with Jo trying to help the ailing Doctor & exploring the jungle & the Thal ship is quite unsettling. The 'air duct escape' is a gripping moment & Part 3 benefits from the moodiness of B &W (the scenes in the ice tunnels are particularly effective). Sadly though, the Gold Dalek in the final episode, so grand in memory, now looks like a tatty, oversized Christmas bauble & is depressingly symbolic of how the whole story appears to me now. Episodic & padded, it doesn't hang together very well & is a lazy-ass rehash as the Co-Pilot points out. Still, it is eminently watchable.

'Green Death'

Co-Pilot – Probably better in memory than reality. The special effects are pretty crap apart from a few terrific maggot moments (such as Jo being menaced late at night in the lounge). The ending with the Doctor driving off is surprisingly emotional & overall I like the theme; humans messing up the environment & causing things to get out of control.

Lucozer – Shame about the dodgy CSO special effects. An involving romp & probably the most 'Pertwee' Pertwee story; UNIT, Bessie, ecological/ political themes, misguided humans, chase scenes, action sequences, caves etc etc. BOSS is quite entertaining even though it looks like a crap 'Goodies' prop. Jo's final scene I thought very sad as a kid & it still holds up now. A bit padded & silly in parts, but still most enjoyable.


SEASON 11

'Time Warrior'

Co-Pilot – Linx is terrific, his costume is superb. When he pulls off the helmet for the first time…very memorable. The rest of the story is a bit tired though. It has potential but overall nothing better than an average run-around.

Lucozer – Linx is superb, Kevin Lindsay is the definitive Sontaran & the Friedlander mask is masterful. Why did the Sontaron masks deteriorate so much after this? They looked dreadful in 'Invasion Of Time' & 'Two Doctors'. Anyway, I digress, 'Time' succeeds on its own modest terms & is fairly well executed. A great first showing for the smashing Ms Sladen too. It just lacks classic moments beyond Linx removing his mask for the first time & later copping an arrow in the Probic vent. Forgetting all serious credibility briefly (not that I lay claim to a great amount) if Irongron had a haircut, a shave & a damn good scrub, he'd be HOT, I shit you not! The 'Lucozer Award' for 'Sexiest Pertwee Guest Star' goes to…Mr David Daker!

'Invasion Of The Dinosaurs'

Co-Pilot – Not since 'Unearthly Child' has such a cracking first episode been let down so badly by what follows it. The rest of the story is actually not too bad I suppose - the intrigue is really good & Yates turning bad is also very dramatic & memorable. Grover tricking Sarah, Sarah waking up on the spaceship, the Whomobile…all great stuff….but so much padding! And of course the Petrodacktyl is something else altogether…Klack Klack!

Lucozer – The diabolical dinosaurs aside, this is not really that far removed from some of the Pertwee classics like 'Green Death' in many ways. I find it quite entertaining despite the usual could-a-done-it-in-four padding. The space ship scenes are fairly well handled & The 'Golden Age' team of Peter Miles & Martin Jarvis are very effective. Part one is wonderfully creepy & this is by no means the unmitigated disaster of repute.

'Death To The Daleks'

Co-Pilot – An often-overlooked gem. The TARDIS being drained of energy, the Doctor being attacked outside in the darkness, Sarah finding blood on the Doctor' candlestick, the voodoo chanting of the Exillons, the Exillon city, the Dalek machine gun being tested on the model TARDIS, the root killing a poor Exillon who can't escape in time, the antibodies that materialise to protect the city…. a series of extraordinarily effective moments – all punctuated by some of the most amazing incidental music the series ever had. 'Death' is a hidden classic. Riveting.

Lucozer – It looks a tad shabby at times, but it has a tense & sinister feel to it. Part one is superb; the lights going out in the TARDIS & then the Doctor & Sarah both wandering alone in the darkness…shivers & tingles! The incidental music probably bows only to the 'Sea Devils' in the whole of the Pertwee era. The sound the city makes & the moment Sarah first sees it are indelibly stamped on my memory. The Daleks losing power renders them vulnerable & allows us to see their true resourcefulness & cunning; perhaps more than ever before. Bellal is sensitively played & quite charming. There is clearly more inspiration & effort in this script than 'Planet Of The Daleks' (which I feel I was a little too hard on by the by). I too will stick my neck out; this is gritty, atmospheric, involving, tightly scripted & full of evocative moments. A few flat guest performances aside, criminally underrated.

'Monster Of Peladon'

Co-Pilot – This tired old mess vies with 'The Web Planet' for the title of worst ever 6 parter. If only the production team had skived two parts off this, Invasion Of The Dinosaurs & Planet Of Spiders – & made a really decent six parter – Jon's final season might be remembered in a better light. Also a shame that after giving the Ice Warrior race a bit of dignity in Curse Of Peladon, Brian Hayles goes & turns them back into boring old thugs again…

Lucozer – Dire indeed; it looks tired & cheap & if you can feel any sympathy for the mineworkers who basically just grunt & chant 'strawberries, strawberries, strawberries' (and fail to do that with any real conviction) then you're seeing something I can't. Jon & Lis are great, but it's sloppy, excruciatingly padded & fatally dull & uninvolving.

'Planet Of Spiders'

Co-Pilot – Unfortunately this is an uninspired end to JP's reign. The spiders look ok at best & Lupton's inability to deliver even the simplest lines with conviction is grating. The less said about the "oh my husband, my husband" fiasco the better. How can something be so wonderful when you are 7 & so bollocks when you are 27? Not the absolute, no holds barred classic it once seemed. There are some good bits though. The stuff with K'anpo & Cho'Je is pretty good – the Buddhist stuff is pretty good too – the idea of the Doctor getting too big for his boots and having to face his deepest fears is a nice prelude to his regeneration.

Lucozer – Despite the padding & proverbial dogs bollocks woeful bits, it has a suitably foreboding tone & I have so many vivid childhood memories. The Metebelis crystal, the professor looking into it, the spider on Sarah's back, the creepy chanting, Omm mane padme hum? Tommy, the voices of the spiders...Nostalgia just gets this past my critical razor wire. Ultimately it wins kudos for thrilling me as a child as it was only ever designed to do.


THE END

So that's it. What a hefty undertaking! Stay tuned for the Co-Pilot's incisive Pertwee era summary coming soon.....

WELCOME TO WUUNDANOOGOO!!

'Wuundanoogoo' is a site devoted to passionate & humorous discussion of all aspects of the ‘Classic’ & ‘New’ series of BBC TVs ‘Doctor Who’ (and its spin-offs), specifically on television, from 1963 to eternity....

About your hosts...

'The Skonnon Co-Pilot' (b. Dec 1975) & 'The Lucozer' (b. Jan 1977)

They used to fashion TARDIS's out of side porches, upturned laundry baskets, broken typewriters, clunky calculators & mind numbing suspension of disbelief. They made their little sisters dress up as companions. Their parents took photos...& still have them!

At primary school, they roped in rapidly disinterested classmates to play ‘Doctor Who’ at lunchtimes & scrawled ever-changing cast lists in the back of the Lucozer's tatty ‘Technical Manual’. Perversely emboldened, this obsessive two-headed monster hijacked their Year 5 class puppet play & created a Dr Who Extravaganza with Dracula, Frankenstein & The Wolfman shoehorned into their preposterous plot.

On several occasions, they even spread out their combined collections of Doctor Who novels in chronological order on the lounge room floor, as if a summit of universal significance. As if, ‘Key To Time’ style, with the final Target novelisation in place, the forces of good & evil in the universe might be brought back into rightful balance, or more importantly, bequeath them omnipotent powers over their flummoxed & increasingly disapproving parents.

An 11.45pm late night re-screening of the ‘Five Doctors’ in 1984 was the glittering pinnacle of their young lives; & when made to go to bed early to make up for the soon-to-be-lost sleep, they stared at the ceiling rafters (The Lucozer) & the bunk bed slats above (The Co-Pilot) unable to sleep; wide eyed, with fist biting & potentially pyjama soiling anticipation!

Their singular obsession continued, over 20 years later, when they laughingly hatched a cunning plan to seduce Captain Jack himself, the smouldering Mr. Barrowman, into a threesome at a sci-fi convention in Sydney. The Co-Pilot is straight & both are in long term monogamous relationships! Such is their love of this show & such is its power & charm! Sadly, the convention was postponed & they are still to realise this saucy dream! They have had an enduring, yet sometimes dysfunctional & occasionally unhealthy relationship with the program for nigh on 25 years.

Strangely though? They both agree that (gasp!!) only about a third of the entire televised Doctor Who canon could reasonably be considered “quality” TV, with the other two thirds ranging from reasonable at best to downright execrable at worst. How can this be? How can they love something so dearly when they share, at best, a ho-hum attitude to nearly two thirds of its staggeringly large & varied tele-visual entirety?

You may find the answer in ‘Wuundanoogoo!’; their loving tribute to the excessively obscure, to the embarrasingly esoteric & to the spirit of passionate debate & (dubious?) good humour in the wonderful ‘Worlds Of Doctor Who’.....

'The Lucozer' (Feb 2007)